Fools Like Us
by User 627
Summary: Marco certainly did not expect to find a beautiful blonde haired girl in his backyard claiming to be a princess from another dimension. One thing's for sure; he'll be having a hard time dealing with her snobbish "holier-than-thou" attitude. (AU where Star and Marco don't exactly get along)
1. Chapter 1: Two Miserable Souls

**This is my AU. Inspired by the Gravity Falls AU: Reverse Falls in which everyone had reverse personalities. The same concept applies here, but not completely.**

 **Warning: Swearing and curse words.**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 1: Two Miserable Souls**_

* * *

"A princess must always keep her poise." Star Butterfly recited to herself, trying to hold in all her stress.

The princess of Mewni clad in a blue Victorian dress strolled along quietly through the castle hallways. She had just finished another rigid training session from her strict etiquette instructor. The blonde almost felt her head was going to explode with all the information she had to keep inside of her mind.

As she was on her way to her room, she passed by a maid carrying some laundry who did a quick bow to her and made her way.

' _You commoners have no idea how lucky you are.'_ Star thought to herself bitterly. Ah, what she wouldn't give to have a day inside the shoes of those not of noble birth. Her high-heeled shoes hurt a lot on her feet when worn for too long, which was unfortunately quite frequent. Everyone thought just because she was a princess, she was perfect, so she was entitled as such to keep up her image.

' _As my mother says so...'_ Star wanted to shake her head in frustration, but she couldn't due to the fact that it would be improper to display emotion to the servants going past her way.

"Ah, Star, there you are..." An authoritative voice came from behind her making her turn to the source.

There was Queen Butterfly heading towards her ever-so-stoic, clad in a blue dress quite similar to her daughter's with her blue hair standing up in the shape of a heart. Star inwardly shivered at the sight of her hair. She couldn't imagine one day having to style her long blonde hair into that. She didn't quite appreciate its design and looks too tedious to maintain every day.

"Are you finished with your etiquette lessons, my dear?"

"Yes, mother." Star responded politely. Her speech instructor made she there was nothing but respect when she was speaking to a superior and that she spoke with eloquence. Not a single word would be misspelled, mispronounced, and out of place.

"Good, good..." Moon Butterfly said. Like her daughter, her posture was perfect. There wouldn't be any mistakes confusing her for anything other than of higher status.

Her mother might have been proud of her Butterfly heritage, but Star could've made for a compelling argument that life in royal bloodlines was taxing, restricting and tiresome. She wished she could've been like her father, River Butterfly, who belonged to a family of noble warriors who've fought for Mewni's royals in their time of darkness. At least then she would've had the freedom she so desperately wanted.

"Have you made the necessary preparations to travel to Gallia?"

"Yes, mother. My things are ready."

Gallia was a neighboring dimension that rich in the ways of warfare and technology while Mewni was rich in terms of trade, culture, and magic. Her parents made plans to depart to Gallia for—

"Very good, Star. I hope you've learned well from your lessons. You wouldn't want to seem lacking in any way to your future husband, would you?"

An arranged marriage. Nothing really out of place about it, really. Marriage would unite the two kingdoms of Mewni and Gallia together making them an unstoppable force to the enemy kingdoms from other dimensions. Not to say that Mewni was a weak kingdom, but with the forces of Gallia, which was rumored to have one of the strongest military in existence, added into their ranks, they would be a force to be reckoned with together.

"No, mother, I would most certainly not." Not that she had much of a choice. She wouldn't want her mother to be angry that she botched the chance for her to be betrothed.

Star thought that maybe being married to a warrior prince like her father was wouldn't be so bad. Maybe she could have the freedom she so desperately wanted with her fiancée than with her mother. While it was a long shot, it wasn't necessarily out of reach.

Though, she hoped that he would be quite the looker. She didn't want to be married to an ugly war-obsessed ogre. Maybe there was such a thing as a handsome warrior prince in glimmering armour and shiny hair? She did not know the answer, but she hoped.

Even if she was a princess, she was still a teenage girl on her sixteenth year.

"Good, now off to bed with you. We have a busy day tomorrow travelling. Make sure to get a lot of rest."

"Of course, mother."

With that, Star Butterfly, Princess of Mewni, left for her chambers silently wishing her life was much more exciting.

000

 _Meanwhile in another dimension called Earth..._

"Fight! Fight! Fight!"

Marco Diaz couldn't think so well with the crowd chanting. It was hard for him to focus on his opponent with everyone's voices drowning his ears. All he could do was keep his eyes on Julian, a jock that had started to harass him earlier this morning for a reason he can't even remember.

"Come here, wimp!"

With the dumb jock coming in with a fury of punches, Marco did his best to dodge and block most of them with some unfortunately hitting him good. He did throw a few back with one landing on Julian's nose. This was one of the times he wished he knew a martial art. He may have known how to fight, but he was no martial artist.

Now he may not be as buff as Julian, but he isn't scrawny either and can put up a decent fight. Unfortunately, he wasn't as strong as a buffed up jock who worked out every day but had low grades to make up for it.

He may have had the brains, but Julian outmatched him in every turn.

Despite that his lips hid a small smile through it all as he could see a small black eye starting to form on one of Julian's eyes.

That didn't mean that his own ribs didn't hurt though. It felt that some of his lower torso was in pain and his nose felt like it was bending the wrong way.

Julian's arms moved in a flash, and before Marco could tell, he was locked in a bear hug and pushed against the table scattering the food behind him unto the ground.

"Ack! Get off me!" Marco tried to break free, but Julian was too strong.

"You think you're tough, Diaz? I'll show you!" He lifted the boy and slammed him into the surface of the lunch table. Marco could feel the food on the back of his shirt and his head spinning.

With a few more squirms, he got an arm free from the hug and started to elbow Julian on the head. He could feel that it was starting to take its effect as the brute of a jock was loosening his grip. His knees also helped by hitting him in the stomach.

' _Damn, he's like a fucking bear.'_ Marco was astonished just to see how tough the bastard, Julian, really was.

"That's enough!" A strong voice yelled out drowning all the others.

In a flash, Julian was thrown off Marco by another strong jock by the name of Justin. The blonde football captain of Echo Creek Academy stood in all his glory holding the back of Julian's collar in a tight grip.

He did not look happy.

All of the students in the cafeteria went quiet as the most popular teen in school demanded attention.

"Who started this?" Justin looked around for answers among the crowd his eyes drifted to Marco for a flash of a second.

They all pointed at Julian. Marco exhaled in relief. At least people weren't complete assholes.

"So it was you, eh?" Justin glared at his football comrade who seemed to have shrunken in fear.

"Look, Justin, man, I can explain. The Mexican kid just pissed—"

"Shut up!" Justin shoved him down onto the floor. Julian looked like he was about to piss himself. "Do you know how embarrassing this is for the team?"

Before Julian could even answer, Justin continued.

"This isn't the first time you've picked a fight with another guy just because he ain't from the country. You want our team to be known as a bunch of racist assholes?"

Marco wanted to point out that he was born in America but he decided it wasn't worth the effort.

"Now apologize to the guy!"

Julian didn't look all too happy by the order but turned to Marco and said a grudging "sorry" before getting up.

"Now get out of here. One more strike like this and I'm telling the coach to lay you off."

Julian huffed, straightened his posture and walked away preserving his dignity. Marco, on the other hand, looked ridiculous with food on the back of his shirt and broken nose.

"You okay, man?" Justin approached him and gave him a hand wiping off the food from his back.

"Just peachy." Marco looked about in ire.

"Sorry about Julian. He's an asshole, okay? Not even everyone on the team likes him."

' _Yeah, but he still gets a hot date every Friday night and I'm stuck alone watching romantic comedies by myself.'_ Marco thought bitterly.

"Look, you should get that nose checked out. I'll tell the team not to bother you."

"Thanks, man. I appreciate it." Marco could see why Justin would be so popular even with the nerds and outcasts of the school. He earned it.

After the jock walked away from the scene, Marco slunk back into the seat. His body was in pain and his nose hurt. He didn't want to attend the next class, but he didn't want to be known for ditching either. Ms. Skullnick really lived up to her namesake.

"What's going on here? What's with all the mess on the floor?"

"Oh, no..." Marco gasped. He knew it was the voice of the principal.

"Who did this?" Principal Skeeves looked downright furious staring at the messy lunchroom floor. "Was there an earthquake? Or did somebody have a fight here?"

All the students pointed at Marco.

"So it was you, eh?" The fat man walked dangerously to Marco. He immediately noticed the broken nose and some messy food on his back and already knew that there had been a fight.

"Wait, I can explain! I didn't start the fight, it was-"

"Detention!" Skeeves would have none of it. He had no interest in listening to whatever excuse Marco thought up.

"Aw, come on!" Marco complained.

"For one week, young man! Now march into the nurse's office!"

Marco wanted to complain some more, but kept his mouth shut. He just scurried along to the nurse's office slouching and pissed off.

' _And Julian doesn't even get in trouble for this...'_

As he walked through the hallways with numerous students staring at him, he silently wished that his luck would turn for the better.

000

 _Back in the Kingdom of Mewni..._

"Is the royal carriage ready to move?"

"Yes, your majesty."

"Good. We'll leave in half an hour."

River Butterfly sent the knight on his way and went back to overseeing the convoy meant to protect them on their way to Gallia. Although he already had the knight captain for that, he wanted to make sure every nook and cranny wasn't vulnerable in any way himself.

Though in all honesty, they didn't really even need all the guards to travel to the Gallia dimension. They could just use a pair of dimensional scissors to instantly teleport themselves to Gallia and be done with it, but they had to keep up appearances of seeming powerful and important so having a royal guard at their beck and call would increase Gallia's opinion of them.

With such a big convoy, they couldn't very well fit through a dimensional portal created with dimensional scissors. It would be like a horse trying to go through a needle's eye. They would have to use the old dimensional portal on the other side of their kingdom which would take about no less than seven hours.

He would've continued investigating the warnicorn in front of him but someone interrupted his inspection.

"Father."

King Butterfly smiled upon seeing his daughter come up close to him for a hug.

"Ah, Star, good to see you." He hugged her back. "Are you ready to meet your future husband?"

Star took a step back breaking the embrace. The blonde teen looked rather melancholic.

"In all honesty, Father, I'm scared of meeting him."

"Well, what's the matter?" River asked. The king of Mewni wasn't especially too good with people, but he had heart. He was truly the only person whom Star could confide in. To the rest of the world, she was the unapproachable princess of Mewni whose beauty and dignified grace was the stuff of fairy tales, but to her father, she was his little girl, and to him nothing in the world was more precious.

"Father, I've never met this man. I don't even know what he looks like." Star voiced out her worries. "Am I really to marry him?"

King Butterfly looked at his daughter in sympathy. He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. Try as he might to explain, he truly had no idea how his daughter felt right now. He fought like a beast possessed for Moon's hand. Getting her to even notice him was not easy but he had won her heart in the end. Even more so when he tried to fight for her parents approval to marry her.

"If you'd like, I could talk your mother out of it." He offered. "But I doubt she'd be in a listening mood. We've been trying so hard to establish a relationship with Gallia. It was finally a miracle that we even got their royal family to marry you off with their son."

Star shook her head and straightens her posture.

"Never mind, Father." She reverted back to the dignity and elegance of a princess. She did not like it, but she eventually resigned to her fate. She was well aware that she had better luck breaking down the castle walls than ever getting through her mother's head. The same goes for her father. "But thank you for understanding."

"Star..."

The princess of Mewni threw her father one of those fake plastic smiles taught by her instructors designed to humour a guest visiting or telling a bad joke.

River started to look a little guilty. Unlike his wife, he never had etiquette lessons or those rigid poise and grace nonsense that the nobles of Mewni seemed to be so damned proud of. So he couldn't hide his facial emotion very well. He couldn't hide his facial expression period. The man looked like he was about to cry.

Before he could break down in tears, however, a certain important female embodiment of nobility walked into the scene.

"Is everything ready? River, why are you...are you alright, dear?" Moon Butterfly had just arrived looking rather worried at the sight of River's face. She approached her husband who wiped a tear from his face.

"Oh, nothing, dear. Just a little sad to see our daughter all grown up."

Queen Butterfly shook her head in disapproval. She didn't like River's lack of self control. Even if it was showing emotion for their daughter, nobility should always keep their posture and cool.

"Star, are your things ready?"

"Yes, Mother." The blonde princess nodded with respect.

Moon allowed a small smile to grace her person. She was glad that her daughter had not turned out like River. She really did love the man, but she wished that he took a few etiquette lessons. They would do him some good.

"Good." The Queen nodded with approval. "Make sure to be on your best behaviour, Star. You and your future husband will be getting to know each other for a few days."

Star nodded with a more stoic face than her mother's. That means staying at Gallia for a few days. Who knows? Maybe her parents might not even come back for her.

Deep down inside, she secretly harboured some envy for her mother. Moon Butterfly got to marry the man of her choice while she had no such luxury. She considered that rather unfair.

Where was her white knight when she needed him? Has he fallen on a cliff and gotten himself killed?

She dismissed the thought.

What would it matter?

Perhaps she'll find her luck in this warrior prince she's destined to marry? She didn't even know what he looked like. She hoped that he was handsome. Perhaps he had the refined manners of a knight that would steal her heart when they first lay their eyes on each other.

She knew reality well enough to know that it was a long shot. But she wanted to hold on to a glimmer of hope that her future wouldn't be so restricting and suffocating.

And that's why she _absolutely_ despised commoners. They have no idea just how truly lucky they are. What she wouldn't give to trade places with one of the middle class girls from town.

Star Butterfly wanted an adventure. She wanted to be a real heroine of a story like her mother was. She wanted to make her own choices. She wanted to fight monsters like her dad. Most of all, she wanted a knight to protect her not some snobbish royal prince.

True love was more than she could ever ask for.

000

 _Unknown area..._

"Master Ludo, the preparations are complete. We are ready to attack the Mewni royals once they reach the old dimensional portal."

A crooked smile from a beak etched a terrifying grim intention behind it.

"...good..."

000

"You must remember to display only the finest manners upon meeting the Gallia Royal Family."

' _A princess must keep her poise.'_

"Remember to only speak when you are spoken to."

' _A princess must keep her poise...'_

"Your pinkie finger must be arched exactly ninety degrees upon drinking tea."

' _A princess_ _ **must**_ _keep her poise...'_

Star Butterfly was about to explode. Only repeating the mantra inside her head over and over again while pretending to listen gave her the self control she needed.

Her mother felt the need to remind her of her etiquette lessons during the entire trip to the old dimensional portal for **seven hours straight**. If Star hadn't had those lessons beaten into the back of her head she might have been impressed at how long her mother could've talked without apparently breathing. She suspected magic was at play but perhaps it was merely a skill achieved through countless practice.

To think her mother married her father instead of The Big Old Book of Refined Etiquette was quite the wonder for her indeed.

"Ah, we're almost there, dear." Her father, River mentioned. The old retired warrior recognized some of the structure of the pathway.

Star almost, _almost_ , sighed in relief. It took every bit of willpower to catch herself in that split second. Her mother would've been furious. She was so happy that she wouldn't have to bear her mother's nagging for too long now.

Before Moon could speak anything about the situation, a loud bang suddenly rang in their ears.

"We're under attack!" A yell came from outside.

Before Star could even blink, sounds of blades clashing and utter chaos erupted from the outside of their royal warnicorn carriage.

"Good heavens!" River shouted, kicking the carriage door open.

"River, where are you going?!"

"I must join the fight!" He ordered looking outside. "You two stay here! Moon, keep Star safe with your magic!"

"Wait, River!" Before she could grab her husband, the man already left the carriage slamming the door shut behind him. Star could hear her father's war screams from the other side.

The Princess of Mewni did something she never thought she'd do.

She clung on to her mother.

Moon wrapped an arm around her daughter protectively. During times like these she made an exception to break out of her queenly exterior.

The Queen of Mewni was not a defenceless damsel in distress. She was a high level Mage whose magic was one of the best in existence period. It was unfortunate she did not bring her wand. Without it, casting spells would take too much of her energy and would be relatively hard to do. This meant that she wouldn't last long if she were to join the fight outside.

The only possible option was to Dip Down.

Moon had experience Dipping Down, but not by a large margin. It was hard to focus enough will to access the magic within the Butterfly bloodline even more so when under stressful situations like these.

"Don't be afraid, Star. I promise everything will be alright." She assured her child and began glowing in blue.

Before whatever spells that it was that she was going to cast, the royal carriage suddenly flew back and landed on its side throwing Moon and Star to the other side of the carriage with the door to exit facing them above.

The door opened in front of them.

"Hello, your majesties."

Star gasped.

On the top of the side-fallen carriage was an ugly frog looking creature that had a humanoid physiology. It made the monster look freakish and straight out of a fairy tale from a swamp horror story. Star felt her spine shiver. She had never seen such a beast up close.

"Get away, you disgusting fiend." Moon shouted.

The smile it gave off only made the two royals more uncomfortable. Its teeth were quite sharp, they could probably grind metal.

"Now what did I do wrong?" The frog-like thing asked. "It's not like I'm here to hurt any of you."

The monster jumped down the carriage. With a thud, both the Butterfly women came face-to-face with an ugly beast who looked like he could rip even the toughest of knights with one swipe of his razor claws. The beast even carried armour. Star was very surprised at learning that a monster actually carried some intelligence enough to wear any form of protection. It could even talk.

Moon held her child protectively.

"What do you want?"

"Hey, I don't want to hurt nobody." The frog monster shrugged. His menacing grin still displayed in full glory. "Just following orders."

Star couldn't get a word out as the ugly frog creature grabbed her and with a pull, launched her unto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

"Get your hands off my daughter!"

The ugly monster snorted. "Don't make this any harder than it has to be, Queen Toots. I'm only here for the girl."

Star did shriek when the ugly monster leaped above the exit.

"Star!" She could hear her mother shout from below.

Never had Star ever wanted to listen to her mother's etiquette lectures more than her screams of worry.

It wasn't just Moon Butterfly who noticed her daughter getting carried off by a strange ugly beast.

"No, my daughter!" King River Butterfly yelled, his sword deep into another monsters abdomen. "Guards!"

All of the Royal Mewni Knights took after the frog-like monster but was blocked by the other monsters.

King River was helpless to save his precious daughter. All he could hear was her screams silently going deeper and deeper into the Forest of Certain Death until he could hear her no more.

000

 _A while later..._

"You're not going to eat?"

No answer.

"Strange, I heard that corn was the best kind of food for a Mewni."

"What do you want from me, foul beast?" Star looked at her kidnapper with disdain and hostility.

The ugly frog-like beast played mockingly offended.

"Hey, no need for the name calling. It's not like I'm kidnapping you cause I got anything against you. I'm just following orders from the boss."

The both of them were sitting around a campfire. The fire itself was made of special herbs that emitted a strange scent that kept other beasts away. It definitely told Star that she wasn't dealing with an amateur. This beast as undignified and uncultured as he seems was very intelligent.

"What boss, monster?" Star spat. It was a shame that this ugly frog-like beast was immune to his own recipe.

"Don't have to tell you." The monster shrugged. "It's Yvgeny, not 'monster', got it?"

' _To think your foul appearance wouldn't be any uglier than your name.'_ Star responded in the back of her mind. She took note the beast held a strange accent. It knew how to speak, then perhaps it was a limitation of his lungs as part of a weird toad-like species?

"No matter how extensive my eloquence lessons are, even someone such as myself will have a difficult time pronouncing that."

Yvgeny looked fairly offended.

"Tch, you nobles and your uptight attitude...a guy like me asks for a simple courtesy and you expect to be waited hand and foot?" He actually sounded fairly mad. "Times really haven't changed."

Before Star could ask what that meant, Yvgeny continued.

"You Mewni took everything from us a long time ago. These lands belonged to us. With Mewni expansion, your family forced my kind to retreat into the darkness."

"Don't try to spin the tale on me!" Star hissed. "Mewmen have been terrorized by your kind as far as my ancestors lived. I know my history!"

Yvgeny scoffed.

"Is that what they told you?" His eyes were staring at the fire seemingly lost in thought. "If they told you that Mewmen evolved from warnicorns would you have believed it?"

Star's glare intensified.

"You won't convince me to believe your lies!"

Yvgeny shook his head, chuckling.

"Of course not, of course not...now I feel like an idiot trying to tell you. We're obviously the bad guys now."

Star looked at Yvgeny with caution. He seemed to have been brushing off their earlier conversation as a joke.

"Now go to sleep. You can try to run away if you'd like, but I doubt you'll survive out there in the wild. You do know where we're at right since you're so literate on your history?"

Star had no interested in telling him that she didn't entertain the thought, but she very well knew that her chances of survival out there in The Forest of Certain Death would only end in certain death. It was in the moniker. She had more chances surviving with this ugly beast than she did on her own out there.

"Now go to sleep."

000

 _A few hours later..._

' _Is he finally asleep?'_

Star took a peek at Yvgeny. The frog beast's chest was rising and falling soundly at a steady pace.

The blonde princess decided it was now or never. It was either earn her freedom or be subjected to whatever slavery and torture Yvgeny's master would've subjected her to.

She wasn't dumb enough to run straight into the Forest of Certain Death, she did have a plan up her sleeve. She actually had more than one, but decided that the best plan was to rummage through Yvgeny's supplies to see if she could find anything useful.

There was a small bag the frog was carrying around that was right next to the ground he was sleeping on. It apparently seemed that the monster had some manners letting her sleep on the more comfortable side of the campfire. How surprising.

Still, she was used to the luxury of her fluffy bed at home, she couldn't sleep on such filth even if had chosen to be compliant.

Escape was her only option.

She carefully made her steps to get to the bag that belonged to Yvgeny. It was fairly difficult to do so when wearing a dress, but she somehow managed.

' _Now what tools did this disgusting toad bring with him that I can use?'_

Star rummaged through the small bag. She brought out a small book, a pencil, a pair of scissors, and some corn.

' _Useless, just useless!'_

How in underworld's name is she going to find a way out of the woods with these? Stab them with a pencil and whack them with a book? Maybe even use some of the corn to distract them.

"Well, what do we have here?"

"Ack!" For a moment, Star could've sworn her heart stop. Then it began beating like drums are her body rushed in adrenaline looking back at the monster behind her.

Yvgeny shook his head.

"I thought this might happen." He said in mock disappointment. "You really think you're dealing with an amateur, your highness? I now every possible move you could've made before you even thought of them."

Star could only stare in horror.

"I didn't want to this, but now I'm going to have to tie you up." Yvgeny got a rope from behind his armour and made a grab for her.

"No, get away! Leave me alone, you foul beast!"

"Stop struggling! You're making this harder for yourself!" A strong pair of arms grabbed her shoulders and pushed her down into the floor.

"Get away!" Star started to panic.

"I'm not going to hurt you!"

The blonde princess struggled as hard as she could.

"Unhand me!"

"Stay still! I've been a rather hospitable kidnapper lately and I deserve a little bit of respect, don't you think?"

" **Get away!"**

A strong and powerful force of energy blew out of Star blasting off Yvgeny away hitting a tree, knocking him out for good.

Star Butterfly was glowing blue and her eyes were shining with immeasurable power. The entire dark forest was glowing and shining with Star's extremely powerful magic that can be seen from quite a distance.

" **You dare touch me, you worm!"** It wasn't the voice of the cold but elegant princess speaking in Star's body. It was the voice of some other entity entirely. It was like a different being had taken over her body. A being much more threatening.

As fast as it came, the blue glow that emitted from her body soon disappeared back into her and she collapsed on her knees.

Star was breathing heavily. She had no idea what just happened. The burst of power—the magic that was inside of her. She felt an incredible burst of energy for a quick fading moment. In that moment, she felt like not a thing in existence could stop her whims. She always knew that the Butterfly lineage had very powerful magic, but she had not received her wand as of yet nor has she received any form of magic training as far as she could remember.

...what was that?

...

...

...

What was she?

"Oh, no..." Star looked around and realized that there was no more campfire that emitted the scent to drive away beasts as it had been blown out by the magical surge that erupted from her moments ago. She was vulnerable to the creatures from the woods and she had no idea how to summon such power from deep within herself again. She seriously doubted that Yvgeny will be in the mood to defend her from the creatures in the forest after what she had done to him.

"Mother, what should I do now?"

Etiquette instructions were useless in this scenario as she doubt that the beasts in The Forest of Certain Death had any respect for dignity and poise. Eloquence would certainly not be appreciated as any form of noise would only attract them to her. She was doomed.

Why couldn't her father have trained her in the ways of the warrior?

With fear, she hastily picked up the small bag that belonged to Yvgeny from the ground.

"Please let there be something in here I could actually use!" She had hoped that she missed something from earlier when she checked it out.

To her dismay, it was the same things again. A journal she couldn't even read because it was too dark, a pencil, and a pair of scissors...wait, scissors? Could it be?

The princess of Mewni looked at the pair of scissors and hoped that they are what she hoped they'd be.

 _Dimensional scissors._

Why else would Yvgeny carry around a pair of scissors? It had to be dimensional scissors. They just had to be! It was her ticket out of here.

Star held the scissors in front of her and inspected them. She couldn't see much in the dark, but she could see that it was definitely a pair of dimensional scissors from the make out and design. She had seen some of them around before though not too many.

But how do you use them exactly?

Star had never had any form of training in magic. Her mother was insistent on beating poise and elegance into her character that she seemed to neglect teaching her how to actually use the most important part of her bloodline heritage.

Moon Butterfly didn't teach anything about magic at all.

"Please, let this take me back home."

000

 _In another dimension..._

"Stupid jocks, stupid Julian, stupid principal, stupid detentions..." Marco was murmuring to himself as he unlocked the door to his house.

He was once again greeted by an empty house.

The Diaz family household was fairly average for a Californian home, but it seemed rather big for Marco to have to live in it alone. Technically, he did live with his parents, but due to the nature of their jobs, they were often away on the other side of the country and didn't come back for the majority of the year. Marco could count on one hand the number of days that his parents at home this year in total.

Well, technically it was only in the middle of March so it wasn't the longest he's been without his parents.

Well at least he could be thankful that they wouldn't see the broken nose and all the bandages on his face. His mother would've thrown a fit and his dad would probably bring a shovel to school. He did not need that kind of embarrassment. And knowing how his parents really are, he wasn't exaggerating. It was one of the few things he was glad about having to live alone.

"At least I can finally relax now." Marco slumped down the family sofa. He didn't have the energy to drag his legs up the bed for now and needed time to breathe. Detention was one hell of a session when stuck with an annoying prankster named Janna.

Before he could fully relax himself on the sofa and turn on the television, a large noise of metal drums hitting the floor emerged from the backyard.

"Oh, what the hell?!" Marco groaned and forced himself up.

As he strolled past the kitchen to check it out, he couldn't help but have a serious look of ire on his face.

"Better not be those damned neighborhood cats again." He hated having to deal with those pesky felines. They left quite the mess in his backyard just last week. It took him an hour to clean up all the mess.

Opening the back door, he looked around before spotting the garbage bins scattered and disarranged all over the pavement. Trash was littered everywhere on the Diaz household backyard.

Marco would've screamed in frustration but he was just too tired. He approached the mess with intention to clean it up.

He gasped once he noticed it.

Blonde hair. Blue Victorian dress.

A beautiful teenage girl with blonde hair wearing a blue Victorian dress was lying down motionlessly next to the garbage bins. She didn't look like she was alive.

"What the—"

* * *

 _ **Chapter 1: Two Miserable Souls Fin**_


	2. Chapter 2: Life Changing Turns

**Genre Tags: Romance, Drama, Adventure**

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 _ **Chapter 2: Life Changing Turns**_

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"Look, I'm telling you! There's this girl here, she's some sort of fucking psychic! I really don't know how to deal with her. Hello? Hello?!"

Marco slammed the phone unto the receiver for the fifth time after calling 911.

"You have got to be kidding me!"

Blue eyes followed him as he pranced around the living room like a man worrying about the end of the world. It took a moment before he stopped and inhaled then exhaled.

"Are you finished acting like a child now?"

Marco shot her a glare. The blonde his age had called herself by the name of Star Butterfly. It wasn't until just an hour ago that he had found her lying motionlessly around the garbage and now she was sitting in the lounge looking at him like _he_ was some sort of freak. She was the same blonde who had not only used some form of telekinesis to make a mess of the dining room when he had tried to feed her.

The brunette scoffed and then huffed out a surrendering sigh.

"I'm about done now." He said bitterly, carrying a look of defeat. He wanted to respond with something witty, but couldn't think of anything at the moment. The boy was in a lot of stress. The 911 responders wouldn't take him seriously and just told him to get off the line. It only fuelled more to his irritation.

Star merely stared at him impassively. Marco would've shivered if he didn't catch himself. It was as if she was observing a new form of species. Her gaze felt eerily uncomfortable. It was like he was being judged by someone of higher status…and he was parading around like an utter fool.

"Look, I'll head up to bed now, okay? You can use the guest room for tonight, but tomorrow I want you gone, alright?"

Star nodded. She had no idea what to do in this strange planet that she didn't even know the name of. The blonde princess really had no idea how to get back to Mewni. As far as she could tell, the inhabitants of this strange dimension looked quite a lot like Mewnians. In fact, she doesn't even see any difference in their physiologies. Not that she cares to be thorough in observation as of the moment.

What was quite shocking though, was the fact that they both spoke the same language.

"Oh, and could you please put that down? It's a little bit...disturbing."

Star stared at him impassively.

"Do you mean this?" She looked over to the floating pizza slice before looking back at Marco with innocent, curious eyes.

"Yes."

"I'm afraid I don't know how." It had been an accident at first, but as she entered this young man's home, she had shocked him by suddenly having a surge of magic flow into her. The kitchen appliances were suddenly floating in mid air before crashing down and she found out that she could control objects remotely at will.

The only problem was, she didn't quite know how to turn it off.

Marco groaned.

"Argh, fine. Keep your floating pizza."

Star blinked in wonder.

The heiress to the Mewnians throne pondered for a bit as she stared at the boy who was going up the staircase.

"What a strange young man." She commented.

The pizza slice flew into her mouth and she took a bite without using her hands. Star found out that she really liked this strange food that boy called a "pizza" more than she enjoyed corn.

000

 _Up in Marco's room..._

Marco flopped down on his bed, tired as hell.

His entire body felt so damn rusty that it was a surprise that he had managed to last this long. It would be a massive understatement to say that he was surprised at the young blonde downstairs making an appearance and using what seemed to be telekinesis to make a mess of his dining room.

The poor boy had to spend half-an-hour cleaning the garbage cans from the backyard and a full hour cleaning up the dining room.

Marco wanted to be angry, but he simply had no energy left. Between the terrible start of a day he just had, the fight with Julian, getting a week's worth of detention, and that blonde psychic making an appearance on his life.

He just didn't have any energy left to yell. Whatever that blonde's gimmick was, he didn't want any part of it. If he did have the energy, he would've acted more surprised. Those nine-one-one calls only made his day all the more miserable. Though he couldn't help but wonder what her story was.

' _Aw, man, this bed is bliss~!'_ Marco stretched above the soft, sweet comfort of his wonderful, wonderful pillows. He never truly appreciated the soft comfort of his bed until the end of the day. He needed this.

The young teen didn't exactly have the most glorious experiences of being a teenager, but he didn't want to complain. There were others out there who had it worse.

But so far, his life had been anything but the idealized Californian life. Teens his age often avoided him and regarded him as the outcast. Though, he was anything but a bad boy whom everyone feared. He was that one kid no one wanted in their clique because he was too much of a downer.

Not to say that he didn't have friends. There was Alfonzo and Ferguson, whom he always used to hang out with. Those days were the highest points of his life. Unfortunately, Alfonzo's family moved to Texas half a year back and Ferguson's parents finally had enough of his attitude and decided to send him to Spag Union three months ago.

This meant he was practically all by himself for the duration of his high school life. While he did keep in contact with Alfonzo online via social media, Ferguson was hard to contact due to being enrolled in a military school.

Marco Diaz didn't want to tempt fate, but he definitely hated his life.

000

 _Up in the guest room..._

Star Butterfly had no idea what to do.

The blonde princess of Mewni was trapped in a tough position. She was in some sort of weird dimension and stuck on a planet that she didn't even know the name of, much less anyone else. She pretty much just wanted to go home.

She pondered about simply using the Dimensional Scissors again but decided it was simple too risky. The princess didn't know where exactly it would take her. With the way her luck has been turning out, she may end up in a hostile planet. She would much rather take her chances on this one right now.

Star decided to take refuge with the awfully brass young man she met on this strange dimension. She never caught his name, though. She gave hers, but he didn't seem to even be paying attention. How rude!

' _To think that that commoner would know how to treat a princess.'_ Star thought indignant.

Not having much of a choice, the princess undressed herself out of her expensive blue Victorian dress and was only in her underwear.

' _Then again, I never did tell him I was a princess. But my clothing should be enough for any commoner to tell that I'm of noble stature.'_

As Star tried to make sense of the young man's poor behaviour towards royalty, her thoughts drifted more towards her home, Mewni. More specifically, her parents.

As much as she hated her upbringing, she couldn't help but miss her parents. The princess life was the only life she had ever known. Despite her utter hatred for the suffocating burden that came with her birthright as Queen of Mewni, her title and blood did have its advantages and benefits. For one, she always had her own army of servants at her beck and call, to cater to her every whim.

Now, she was alone. She felt alone. There was this heavy twinge inside her beating heart that felt empty and scared.

Was she ever going to see her parents again? Was she ever going to go back home again?

Star glanced at the Dimensional Scissors again. She wondered if the magical object was broken in some way. It had to be. Why else would that ugly frog creature, whom she can't remember the name of, not just use it to get through the Forest of Certain Death?

There were so many things about magic she didn't know of. In fact, she had zero knowledge of it at all.

As she lied down the bed, she slowly landed her own head on the pillow. Star Butterfly slowly started to close her eyes, hoping that her dreams would've provided much needed comfort over reality.

The blanket magically flew over to cover her.

000

 _Elsewhere..._

"Wonderful, absolutely wonderful!" A voice echoed all across the dark room.

Everything had gone according to plan. The heiress to the throne of Mewni was now on Earth, the dimension with the least contact to the rest. Now that he had managed to successfully separate Star Butterfly from her parents, the road ahead should be much smoother.

To think that Yvgeny hadn't used the scissors himself was a minor bump in the road. All the dumb beast had to do was use the Dimensional Scissors he personally rigged to transport the both of them to Earth and everything would've gone according to plan.

It seemed he should've given him more credit. He was right to be suspicious and not trust him. If he had used those scissors he would've been dead by now and the girl would've been in his hands to do with as he wished. To think that Yvgeny was precautious enough to have taken a more physical route was an unforeseen development.

Fortunately, it didn't matter. It seemed that Star Butterfly had some of her father's blood in her, adventurous and innovative. Had it been any other damsel in distress, she would've most likely cowered in fear and his plan would've gone nowhere.

That immense power she had shown at the forest. A crooked, malicious smile slashed across his face. There was no doubt about it. The plan was perfect. Star Butterfly is perfect.

Now all he had to do was go and get her.

000

 _Back at the Forest of Certain Death..._

"Dear, are you seeing this?"

"What...is this?"

In front of the King and Queen of Mewni, was a large scrap of destroyed trees and dead monsters. The both of them had been looking around nonstop at the Forest of Certain Death along with the royal guards since their beloved daughter had been kidnapped. They hadn't even had the time to go back to the castle nor contact and inform Gallia at what happened to their daughter. They immediately began the search after they dispatched of the monsters that attacked their convoy. Fortunately, some of the royal guards, River himself included, had been expert trackers.

What they did find shocked them.

In the middle of the forest had a spot where the trees were destroyed as if they had been cut down by lumberjacks using explosives instead of axes. Monsters, both big and little in size, decorated the ground as lifeless corpses. There were heavy traces of magic everywhere on this spot.

In fact, Moon could feel so much after trace of magical presence that she had to cover her nose as if she was in the range of something foul smelling. While after traces of magic weren't supposed to smell bad (at least, not from her experience), the magical presence here was so strong it completely filled her nostrils. It was almost suffocating. Maybe it was just the forest itself?

"Do you think our darling Star did this?"

Moon shook her head while her hand still covered her nose and mouth with the palm of her hand.

"No...there is just no possible way. Star isn't trained in magic." The Queen of Mewni started looking around with shock written all over her face. "It just cannot be..."

River looked around in shock. Unlike his wife, he couldn't smell anything magic and so didn't cover his nose at all.

"Then what else could've done all this?" The King looked completely lost. "There were no signs of this last week. If the Forest of Certain Death had a giant balding spot where everything was dead, we surely would've gotten a report by now."

River, hailing down from a prestigious lineage of warriors, had been through the Forest of Certain Death on multiple occasions. There had never been anything like this. Not on the history books, not on the maps. This place was definitely new.

"Your Majesty!" A scout knight stood in military attention.

"What is it?" River asked.

"There's a trail leading down towards north of the forest even deeper. We believe they've taken the princess somewhere deeper in the forest."

River steeled a look of determination befitting that of a father whose child was harmed.

"Then we march."

000

 _Back at Earth, Marco's room..._

"Uh...please...don't..." Marco was fast asleep and twirling around his bed. "...leave me..."

It was that moment that the alarm clock rung beside his bed.

Slowly, Marco's eye opened, but when they did they were bloodshot red. He was clearly still tired and in no mood to get up. He couldn't quite grasp what happened yesterday, because his memory had yet to go on its morning jog. All he knew was that he didn't want to go to school today.

"Screw...it. Skippin school..."

His hand shut the alarm clock off. With a twirl, he immediately landed back into the land of the dreams. It's not like he'd be able to pay attention in class anyway, might as well take a day off.

Not like anyone would miss him.

000

 _In the guest room..._

The moment Star Butterfly woke up, she had almost called out for her servants to dress her by instinct and habit before she realized that she wasn't in her own bedroom.

The blonde took a look around slowly and as her eyes captured the unfamiliar layout of the room—it was too foreign and modest to be hers. The memories of what happened the day before suddenly hit her like a hammer to her own person. The strange feeling of insecurity and loneliness crept its way down her spine.

Star had no guards, no servants, and no parents near her to help her.

She felt absolutely vulnerable.

The princess of Mewni may have wished for a commoner's life, but she didn't mean to be ripped apart so roughly from her previous life.

The blonde shook her head. No, it wasn't over. She just had to go back home. Star looked over to the desk table at the side of the bed.

 _Dimensional Scissors._

It was her way back. It was her _only_ way back. The only reason she hadn't used it last night was because she was too tired. What if the scissors didn't take her back to Mewni? She didn't know how to use it, as proven by the fact that she landed on this strange dimension.

The blonde already thought about this the night before, but she was seriously considering taking the risk. She just had to. What way else is there? Surely, that boy isn't going to help her in any way.

Star Butterfly made up her mind.

She was going to use it now.

With determination in her blue, ocean eyes, the princess of Mewni felt revitalized in a way that she had never felt before. The Dimensional Scissors might take her somewhere dangerous, but she had to give it a shot. She isn't even going to bother cleaning herself up first. That could wait until she got back to the castle. Right now she had to take her chances with the scissors. It was the only way home.

Her blue dress floated over to her and she started dressing herself. Even with her princess dress being dirtied; she had nothing else to put on. Her princess tiara flew over though magic and placed itself over her head.

It was time to go.

000

 _Marco's room, a little while later..._

Marco started to slowly open his eyes.

The young man still felt rather tired, but not as much as this morning. His eyelid's still felt heavy, but he didn't want to sleep anymore. Although, his vision was still hazy, he mustered the willpower to sit up.

"Ah..." He moaned. His ribs still hurt. The stinging sensation of the pain suddenly reminded him of yesterday's events. _Fucking Julian..._

He shifted himself and his feet touched the ground. His mind was very much still half-asleep.

His palms went up to cover his eyes and his fingers started massaging his forehead. He began to think about what was happening around school. Hopefully, he wasn't going to get in trouble for ditching. Maybe he could just make up an excuse that he really wasn't feeling well due to the fight yesterday. That should get him out of trouble. Then again, Principal Skeeves would most probably tell him that that was his own fault.

He hated his life sometimes.

Marco stood up and started getting dressed.

While he was putting on his clothes, he started to remember a certain blonde that had crashed unto the garbage cans yesterday. What was up with her? He wondered if she was still around. If so, then he should probably just call the police and let them deal with her.

Still, what the hell happened yesterday? Forget that bastard, Julian. The blonde was definitely the strangest part of his day. That levitation—the way she ruined his kitchen was definitely unappreciated. But how the hell did she do it?

Marco was not the type to believe in the supernatural.

Maybe what she did had something to do with magnets—polarity, perhaps? Wait, no. That wouldn't explain the floating pizza.

Was he being punk'd?

Oh, that would so piss him off.

He finished putting on his pants and, with a glare, went over to the door. Marco decided to he needed to talk to that girl right now.

The young man started walking out of his room and through the hallway. The guest room was right next door to his and across from his parents' room so it wasn't so long.

"Hello?" He started knocking.

Marco's stoic face frowned when he didn't hear an answer.

He started knocking again.

"Hello, are you in there? I need to talk to you." He suddenly realized that he didn't know what her name was. He remember she mention it to him, but didn't quite have the energy to pay attention. He was too tired from the fight and from having to clean up both the garbage bins and the kitchen.

He believed he heard Butterfly or something out of her. He couldn't remember if that was accurate or not. He couldn't remember her name in full.

Now that he thought about it, it was kind of stupid to let someone who you don't even know stay at your house. What if she was dangerous? While she didn't look like she could hurt anybody, Marco knew from experiences that looks could be deceiving. What if she had people chasing after her? Now that was the more dangerous scenario. He didn't want to get involved with whatever it is that she's gotten herself into.

That dress really caught his attention though. Well, that and the tiara she was wearing. Was she in just in some sort of costume party that went wrong? She looked a little too old to be playing princess like an eight year old.

Marco dismissed the thought. It didn't matter.

In the end, he really should've just called the cops and told them that there was an injured girl he found on the alleyway instead of telling 911 that she had some sort of psychic powers. Why did he bother taking her in?

Maybe it's because she was rather pretty? Okay, understatement. Even with her dress dirtied from the trash, Marco could definitely say without a doubt that she was strikingly beautiful even with all the dirt covered all over her. He wondered how many boys fought for her attention.

He shook his head.

Now's not the time to be thinking with his dick.

"Hello?"

Marco was still not receiving any answer from the other side.

"I'm coming in. I hope you're dressed."

With a twist of the knob, he opened the door. The brunette was half-surprised, somewhat expecting the door to be locked.

"Hello?" He called out to the guest room. He found no one there.

The guest room was strangely empty and the blonde he was looking for was nowhere in sight. However, something did catch his attention. Something in the room stood out very much—something that was never there before.

A huge, swirling thing was floating over by the room's window. The only accurate way to describe it was that it looked like some sort of portal straight out of science fiction movies.

Marco's face contorted into disbelief and confusion so much that it was almost comical.

"What the actual fuck?"

000

"This is weird. This is weird. This is so fucking weird." Marco rubbed the upper part of his arms together while walking back and forth within the guest's room the strange blonde girl was staying in.

His eyes keep darting to the strange portal-thing, whatever it is, floating to the side.

Marco's mind couldn't handle everything that was happening. The events of yesterday felt like something the fantasy part of his mind conjured up. He was just too tired to deal with the weirdness that happened that afternoon. But now, now, he was fully rested and he could register what's happening in front of him.

He thought that maybe he was being pranked in one of those insipid prank shows. But seeing what's clearly happening, there's no way any gimmick from Hollywood could pull this off in front of him.

His mind needed answers. He wouldn't be able to just turn around and let this go. He didn't want to just leave whatever this thing is alone inside the guest room.

Marco briefly considered dialling 9-1-1 again before he remembered the events of yesterday. His face scowled when he remembered the shit treatment he got from the responders.

He couldn't count on the help of the law. What was he gonna tell them anyway? There was this floating swirly _thing_ inside his house? Marco shook his head in ire.

He had to do this himself.

Marco slowly approached the portal. With trembling hands, he reached out to the swirling orange portal. When the tip of his fingers touched its surface, Marco felt a brief tingling foreign sensation before pulling his hand back at split second.

"Maybe this isn't such a good idea."

He faced away and shut his eyes firmly before extending a hand again. This time, he actually managed to get in up to his wrist. He slowly peeked open when he saw that his right hand had been completely engulfed to the other side.

The only explanation he could say for the experience was that it was like dipping his hand through a field of bubbles for half a second. His hand felt the breeze, like it was really windy but humid on the other side, while he felt mildly warm inside his own house. He started to really get curious about what's on the other side.

Marco gulped.

"Well, here goes nothing."

With a deep breath, he steeled himself before going through the portal. He rushed in like a bull seeing red, only with eyes closed.

He himself couldn't tell what drove him, curiosity or stupidity. It would only be a matter of time before he found out which.

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 **Chapter Fin...**

 **If you've noticed, I've deleted the previous chapter's author's notes. I'm going to make a habit of doing that from time to time in every story of mine so that it looks neater. I'll delete author's notes after a week or so.**

 **Anyways, onward...**

 **I'm truly sorry for the long update. In truth, this chapter has already been prepared long ago. Problem was, I couldn't tell whether or not I should post it as it was or add more details. I feel as though that this chapter is incomplete in parts and in the way it ended. I wanted this chapter to focus more on the background of Marco and Star's life while setting up the action. What's your opinion of it? Did I rush things or am I slowly building the story up properly?**

 **To explain the emotional drama between Star and Marco in this chapter you have to remember that they're just teenagers. Marco in the canon show was more accepting of magic while this version of him is much more cynical and grounded in the real world. This is a different take on the meeting between the infamous duo of Svtfoe.**

 **To go into details as to what kind of AU this is, this AU is about Star and Marco wishing to be someone like who they are in canon. Marco wishes for something exciting to happen in his life (much like canon Marco's misadventures with Star Butterfly) and wishes for strength (karate kid canon Marco) and wishes for control (safe kid canon Marco). While Star wishes for freedom (much like she has in canon) wants to be a warrior mage (much like canon Star) and yearns for romance she never had (Marco and Tom). This AU is about the main duo trying to fulfill their dreams to escape their crappy life.**

 **As for the long updates, from now on I'm going to try to set deadlines for myself in the nearby future. Although I can't promise anything now, I'm going to at least set one to motivate myself to writing more.**

 **Next Chapter Expectation: December 5**

 **Now before you rage on such a long update period, I do want to point out that this isn't the only story I'm writing. I have Star Vs The Wits of Marco to focus on and this is my first time setting a deadline for myself. Which is tough since I have work to do and such.**


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